A women reaches puberty when she develops curves, boobs and receives that monthly down payment from mother nature. A man reaches puberty when he develops a deeper voice, develops body and muscle mass and grows taller. But if a woman happens to not embody one of these characteristics, it would not take away from her femininity. As long as she had feminine features if not a developed body, or dressed feminine if did not have the features. However, I believe that men have to obey all criteria of masculinity in order to be called a man. A man will never wear dresses, talk with a high voice or not partake in the physical pursuits. Men must cannot have women that are taller than they are. Women cannot be in a relationship with men who are shorter than they are. Okay here is the problem: I once had a friend who I began to like after a serious of hangouts and talk sessions. He was charming, real smooth and had confidence, positive confidence. Yosef was a person who got along with everyone, saw the humor in everything etc. Being a rather small guy never seemed to bother him at all. In fact, where Yosef grew up, the middle east, men of short stature was the norm. Women that he had previously interacted with were of relatively small builds with petite figures too. So perhaps he saw no issue of his physique because where he once lived there had been no issues of height which was why he was content and self-confident. I had liked him a lot, I loved hanging out with him and my friends. However, I never thought to tell him how I felt for I was 5'10 and he 5'6. In those four short inches stood the concrete wall called height, a universally accepted norm of men being bigger than women.
He was amazing but I kept thinking how uncomfortable I would be when he hugged me. The awkwardness of the vision set me so ill at ease that
Saturday, October 30, 2010
Monday, October 11, 2010
Radical this Eco that
I firmly believe that if we are to overturn the masculine ideals which shape our society, we need a complete overhaul of the structural system that is our culture. Radical feminism calls for the total breakdown of the patriarchal system, education, politics, home life and language. That is ultimately what we would have to do if we want immediate results. I believe we are in danger of believing that as soon as women are equated with men then there are no more gains to be made. Yet, I believe it would lead us to the same end result we have now, glorified violence, sexualized TV and the continual objectification of men and women in their sexual roles. There is a problem that we continually ignore. A woman's worth is still determined by superficially, by her looks, her sexuality and her ability to be ageless. Women must always attain this double standard of being smart, ambitious but charming, feminine and definitely not a bitch.
It is the conundrum of the virgin slut. It is worse if your a tease than if you are a ho, however, both will result in your reputation being tarnished. But girls do it because it is seen as a trait of the ideal woman, to be a seductive innocent. But what is this word innocence, what exactly is so pure, sacred about virginity, is it a biological barrier
It is the conundrum of the virgin slut. It is worse if your a tease than if you are a ho, however, both will result in your reputation being tarnished. But girls do it because it is seen as a trait of the ideal woman, to be a seductive innocent. But what is this word innocence, what exactly is so pure, sacred about virginity, is it a biological barrier
Sunday, October 3, 2010
The Liberal Feminist is.........
Last class we were split into groups where each group was to define a term that was discussed in our readings. As we were discussing gender concepts of labor, Cecilia talked about the dichotomy of the home. Traditionally with stay at home moms, the woman provides the free labor for their husbands who can then spend the time at a job making money. This money then comes back to the wife who can spend the money at her leisure. This interdependent process is a very interesting insight into what a marriage is. A business arrangement where labor is exchanged for money and success in money equals harmony. So where is the love? Or does love grow from security and comforts. And if so should we pick someone who is wealthy since money and security are what promises a happy marriage? How many American marriages are happy when the spouses live a low socio-economic lifestyle?
Liberal feminism also gets a lot of shit for being anti- male. Most movements were centered around women trying to overcome obstacles reserved exclusively for men. The "old boys club" as Celia termed it in class on day. Yet, I think it has all been misconstrued. Look, we come from a patriarchal society. We are held by standards, the majority of which were discovered by men. When women sought equality or liberation in her society, she asked that the standard rules that prevented her from doing so, would change, expand to include the opposite sex. But this means highlighting a fallacy within the very fabric of common thought. The ideas of Descartes, Niche, Freud, Marx, Smith, Locke, all male historic figures which have shaped the American dream, created democracy and laid done the premise for the global market, would fall under doubt.
Humans have a remarkable evolutionary skill to change and adapt to different environments. Yet, we have a remarkable ability to be so stubborn in our ideals. Any great social change has always resulted in some type of conflict (war). And yet the change is more apt to do us more good than harm. Radical feminism calls for the over-turning of the social structures which causes the oppression of women everywhere. This means confronting those good old boys and forcing them to meet women at the negotiating table
Liberal feminism also gets a lot of shit for being anti- male. Most movements were centered around women trying to overcome obstacles reserved exclusively for men. The "old boys club" as Celia termed it in class on day. Yet, I think it has all been misconstrued. Look, we come from a patriarchal society. We are held by standards, the majority of which were discovered by men. When women sought equality or liberation in her society, she asked that the standard rules that prevented her from doing so, would change, expand to include the opposite sex. But this means highlighting a fallacy within the very fabric of common thought. The ideas of Descartes, Niche, Freud, Marx, Smith, Locke, all male historic figures which have shaped the American dream, created democracy and laid done the premise for the global market, would fall under doubt.
Humans have a remarkable evolutionary skill to change and adapt to different environments. Yet, we have a remarkable ability to be so stubborn in our ideals. Any great social change has always resulted in some type of conflict (war). And yet the change is more apt to do us more good than harm. Radical feminism calls for the over-turning of the social structures which causes the oppression of women everywhere. This means confronting those good old boys and forcing them to meet women at the negotiating table
Jessica Simpson/Brittney Spears/Paris Hilton:::: The Rise and Fall of the Barbie Doll
The other day I watched a 30 minute news report on Paris Hilton's 10th arrest on drug charges. I couldn't help but notice the way her demeanor showed her state of mind. She flounced into the court room in her designer jeans and thousand dollar blond extensions. For a moment it was if she was untouched by the circumstances that brought her to the hearing. It seemed almost as if the drug charges were unjust, over exaggerated for how can such a beautiful girl, be harshly prosecuted to such an ugly crime. And this is where Valenti's article, Pop culture gone wild, hits it right on the head.
Valenti argues that our sexual culture has labeled girls as beings whose worth is rooted in their looks and willingness. Paris Hilton is a pop culture icon, a blond bombshell whose image is both rich heiress and sexy, promiscuous bad girl. Her fame was born not of acclaimed films or even her wealth, instead she became known for a sex video and the following explicit knowledge of her body that is shared with the rest of the world. But its the norm, rather than society being horrified at such exploitation, it clamors for it. Films like Girls Gone Wild make a net profit of 40 million dollars, all on the exploitation of drunk young teen girls on vacation who are willing to exploit themselves for 15 minutes of fame. Its child pornography sold in a silver disk in the movie section at the all or Walmart, Target etc. The producer of those movies do not ask every girl her age, and we all know that age is so skewed with girls trying to be women and women trying to be girls. But as long as you are considered hot, such are the sacrifices of being desirable.
Sex, sex, sex is what sells and beauty equals happiness and what girl doesn't want to be called beautiful, what girl doesn't want to be happiness. And thus is the vicious cycle. In order to be worthy, you must be attractive, hot and in order to be hot you must be sexy, carefree, willing. In order to achieve these labels, you must make sacrifices.
But the price of being labeled beautiful is all too clearly seen, as publicized by our beloved media. Paris Hilton, the ideal hot girl, was arrested not once but three times on drug charges. Brittney Spears, whose come out video featured her as a school girl in a tight uniform,was rumored to have done drugs and in the wake of a mental breakdown, shaved her head. Jessica Simpson, noted singer whose been labeled in the past as having the hottest body, had a break down as well because of the pressure of being labeled the sexist woman. These women are being crushed under this ideal, this ideal that many women pluck, tuck and starve themselves for.
I had noticed that a classmate of mine was also dating a girl who fit the usual standard of "hottness". Blond hair, blue eyed, tan and the perfect body. He acknowledged that she did indeed fit this beauty standard and that this standard was highly desired. I was sad for a split second, wondering if he understood the implication of his words. I wondered if he ever understood the pressures his girlfriend must feel in order to attain these standards. It is not my place to tell him what I thought. But it is proof that this ideal is accepted, revered, powerful and spreading. I for one feel lucky, my skin and body have no chance of fitting the ideal and because I can't play the game, I decided the rules don't apply to me. Being different can set you free from the pressures of being hot and desirable but that doesn't mean you are not susceptible. Exhibit A: Me
So I send a prayer to all pop culture icons I wish them a peaceful breakdown with all their hair intact.
Valenti argues that our sexual culture has labeled girls as beings whose worth is rooted in their looks and willingness. Paris Hilton is a pop culture icon, a blond bombshell whose image is both rich heiress and sexy, promiscuous bad girl. Her fame was born not of acclaimed films or even her wealth, instead she became known for a sex video and the following explicit knowledge of her body that is shared with the rest of the world. But its the norm, rather than society being horrified at such exploitation, it clamors for it. Films like Girls Gone Wild make a net profit of 40 million dollars, all on the exploitation of drunk young teen girls on vacation who are willing to exploit themselves for 15 minutes of fame. Its child pornography sold in a silver disk in the movie section at the all or Walmart, Target etc. The producer of those movies do not ask every girl her age, and we all know that age is so skewed with girls trying to be women and women trying to be girls. But as long as you are considered hot, such are the sacrifices of being desirable.
Sex, sex, sex is what sells and beauty equals happiness and what girl doesn't want to be called beautiful, what girl doesn't want to be happiness. And thus is the vicious cycle. In order to be worthy, you must be attractive, hot and in order to be hot you must be sexy, carefree, willing. In order to achieve these labels, you must make sacrifices.
But the price of being labeled beautiful is all too clearly seen, as publicized by our beloved media. Paris Hilton, the ideal hot girl, was arrested not once but three times on drug charges. Brittney Spears, whose come out video featured her as a school girl in a tight uniform,was rumored to have done drugs and in the wake of a mental breakdown, shaved her head. Jessica Simpson, noted singer whose been labeled in the past as having the hottest body, had a break down as well because of the pressure of being labeled the sexist woman. These women are being crushed under this ideal, this ideal that many women pluck, tuck and starve themselves for.
I had noticed that a classmate of mine was also dating a girl who fit the usual standard of "hottness". Blond hair, blue eyed, tan and the perfect body. He acknowledged that she did indeed fit this beauty standard and that this standard was highly desired. I was sad for a split second, wondering if he understood the implication of his words. I wondered if he ever understood the pressures his girlfriend must feel in order to attain these standards. It is not my place to tell him what I thought. But it is proof that this ideal is accepted, revered, powerful and spreading. I for one feel lucky, my skin and body have no chance of fitting the ideal and because I can't play the game, I decided the rules don't apply to me. Being different can set you free from the pressures of being hot and desirable but that doesn't mean you are not susceptible. Exhibit A: Me
So I send a prayer to all pop culture icons I wish them a peaceful breakdown with all their hair intact.
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